Oh, Believ Me, You Wouldn’t Know When It’d Happen Actually

This overdosing on Internet, Hollywood, ads, music and stupid self-conscious posts has made you aware of how it would be, all of it. But the truth is that they have only sold a perception of it, only which could be marketed based upon awe.

Look at yourself! You’re willing to be tired more than you’re actually tired! You heeding to your feelings so much that in pursuit to synchronize with what all has been shoved up your ass about happiness and sorrow and all the hues in between, you’re meaninglessly trying to feel their way–not even knowing what exactly you’re feeling! Poor you!

Well, my stomach is aching real bad… I am damned hungry… have slept for 3 hours only in past 40 something hours.. travelled for hours too.. waiting for some shop to open and save me today.. I hope I am not bleeding inside! It’s like a crunch today. But, the good thing is that I have configured gcc-4.8.0.. I just require to build it and install it.. but, cannot! I am too damned hungry!

Playing system of a down, 2011 Rock am’ Ring show! Kill the Rock n’ Roll playing! Such lovely band it is! Getting a hungry person bang his head.. now playing Lost in Hollywood.

… I really don’t know where I am going now.. I am far more truthful to myself, far more easily irritated and lost!


I Must Disappear

The reason why I miss my college the most is I could switch my cell-phone off for a month or so, I could just disappear…. Yesterday I required Tool badly and today it’s System of a Down over again!

I try to keep myself from requiring any particular human, but at the same time look to be very special in life of one of them… this is… very… serious… ’cause they see me as someone who can be reached only for help, and not for birthday parties. I have this feeling that my solitude will be completely realized in couple of years now when most of my friends will be married… moved on… ’cause I am incapable of moving on… it’s all a big long day to me. And maybe I’ll keep whispering to myself that it’s okay if they seem to have forgot… ’cause they didn’t matter to me anyway… my fears and dislike for self never have let anyone be close enough. And if I am giving any value to my feelings, I am not understanding the whole truth anyway. I require to BELIEVE that everything, EVERY DAMNED THING, fits an equation of balance–the one which has eluded physicists so far. The community is always the destination for every human on this round blue planet with life. It’s just when I began picking up the marbles of mine I had lost, I saw many many pretty marbles lying there on ground, in the pits… unattended… like cuteness of stray pups, like locks of hair of a poor prostitute maybe… like agony of your ‘cruel’ boss, which you never want to think ’bout… so, I picked them up too… and right there and then I guess I lost more marbles of mine than I had picked…. 

Finally Figuring Out What Sexiness Is

Well, you age much faster with the latest gadgets than you do without ’em. Same old game of vegetarians tricked into finding meat-balls delicious, like it happens in learning what sexiness is(or must be). Sexiness is nothing but hint to an invitation. But if I don’t have non-vegetarian food, you cannot hint how delicious some meat-ball is. Sadly, if you don’t have non-veg, you’re gay to those who cannot stop thinking ’bout it! HA HA!
The other joke I found very funny was how they get you feeling that you’re missing something if you don’t buy the gadget they’re selling NOW! To survive, they’ll keep innovating, being better.. an hence would want you to buy more of it… to never ever stop feeling old fashioned.

As the words of Great System of a Down go: PULL THE TAPEWORM OUTTA YOUR ASS!