Flawed Understanding of Urges Has Lead to Rapes

The issue of rapes, according to me, begins with the common misunderstanding that if you are adult/adolescent and have sexual urges, you require a girlfriend/boyfriend. The model is okay as far as you find one easily. But, it breaks down upon our failing to understand that sexual urges are born due to hormones which do not understand sexes—they are just mechanical and are set/bound to work if you’re perfectly healthy. So, our misinterprettation of this basic thing makes opposite sex an edible substance. Sexual urges are bound to be even if one is born and grows inside a box, completely oblivious of existence of an opposite sex! The release of oxitocin tries to take the matter further in its own hands by trying to trick the brain into liking other identifying attributes like voice, smell and touch. But, for civilized human beings such as ourselves, even this cannot be called love because it is not intentional… it’s just been happening because you are healthy.

A girlfriend/boyfriend is a human being first and cannot be treated as an edible. This thing is seen in those examples when people who are frequent to visit prostitutes finally find love. And hence it is quite funny how prostitution has built itself up and kept around for really really long now. Nobody wants to be a prostitute[or say a temporary substitute]. So, first of all, we require an education to be able to understand and tame the urges so as we do not make them a reason at all to have relationship in first place. Sadly enough, however, there have been generations now which have built the social structures based entirely upon accepting relationships as outlets, and not as co-inhabitance.

Conclusion: girlfriends/boyfriends are not an answer to sexual urges; presently, there is no answer to these urges except either taming them or simple letting your fluids out.


Hopes and Expectations Objectify People

I have only one expectation from my phone or my chair or my computer, which is why they’re objects and probably I am not afraid to hurt them. My belief that they cannot feel is so so strong. Now imagine I really very very very badly want a cute girl to come and suck my dick… I want this so so badly that I no longer can even see that she’s a human being. Now imagine I tell this to a friend of mine and he feels the same for some other girl. Then one lazy afternoon we watch straight 4 hours of Brazzers and Vivid and Marc Dorcel. … we go home.. in the night, after dinner… around 1 AM, I just play one new movie from Wicked.com or Bang Bros and I jerk a load off… but still I am at unrest. I got school next morning… I see nubile 16 old girls in skirts, belonging to upper middle class families. I am already feeling that I am normal… I am too high on ‘everyone’s feeling this way’! Then the news of a girl from my class having done it exactly like the movies I watched with a guy in some other senior grade. Girls are talking ‘bout it, guys are talking ‘bout it! It is all we have to talk about! This girl who is heard to have done it is suddenly a big-bang of fetishes! She is no longer a human… a specific behaviour is expected out of her. With time, all girls are heard to have done. We’re normal… we’re young… we’re humans… it’s okay to let go… it’s so cool to listen to Selena Gomez or Katy Perry or Snoop Dogg ‘cause all pretty girls and all the guys who get laid often listen to them… I am object to. I know what I do—buy new cell phones, cannot get my hand off internet, want to look cooler every moment, want to be pampered… I want to be everything they all want to be, but before they can be!

… objectification this is.

The Unforgiven III, Metallica #nowplaying

Apologies to the Society

Well, the knowledge is only when you find answers and not the shitload of useless information. If some day you are turned on by a body[male’s or female’s, not necessarily human], you’re in no position to question for you are drowning in what you know about what all makes the body so darn irresistible. However, this same body could be must more than a touch, a smell, a taste, a voice… the body does in fact feel much more than it actually is because of your ‘hormones’.

I once asked a friend of mine who had been both in love and in physical relationship what makes two bodies lovers while love is virtually everywhere. She confirmed that a yearning for eachother’s body is mandatory to be lovers. I have always felt it to be a defeat to look to mollify, to please my body–I don’t have a favourite dish, dislike to sleep and haven’t been able to get myself to like sex either. But this is just because I have known a pleasure beyond bodies and my existence in society–the bliss of being able to explain, of having found answers in numbers, in equations. I don’t think I can ever be a lover in sense of society which is a cloth woven around pursuits for comfort and pleasures. I have no right to look down at it. Maybe they’re preparing for the old age when it would be tough to go on bearing travails….

I am apologizing because I have been lying. I am unable to feel free with thought of people in my consciousness. I am an impostor. I am gullible and stupid because I have yearned to associate with people… because due to my inability to feel free, I tended to keep out… I wanted to belong. I gave a lot of value to anyone who showed a little interest in my being, understood me.. I cursed society with my expectations and wishes.

I am so sorry.

Balls Are Capitalists

They have network[of nerves], have an approach to cabinet[senses in brain] and in fact even have lobbyists ie hormones[testosterone etc] to keep rest of the body in the pathetic state of stress so as their market[of semen] survives and flourishes! It doesn’t end here–sexual priming is the school which this capitalist funds and keeps alive!
This is insane!

Mother and Child Divided, Porcupine Tree #nowplaying


I am a guy and I have surfed far far into the unknown seas of IPs, have come across a lot of porn and have seen why it appealed. The obvious difference between actual sex and porn, well, is the effort involved–free porn is more like a gift, one which has to shout at the top of its lungs to get one to attend it. While actual ‘consensual’ sex has ‘a whole person’ to offer, porn bases its market on misery, laziness, height of unreal-dom–basically what we require entertainment for. Porn’s ease of availability is its negative which it quite fantastically makes a positive by being a realization of ‘back of your mind’, in fact, back of mind of millions like you–feeling the tickle of hormone overflow, a world-wide-web of lazy fantasy infested guys and girls[maybe]. Two of three visits to your favourite tube-porn site and back of your mind is suddenly an adult-expo! This is ease and excess at their best.

Chapter two: Advertising agencies, POP and rest shit

Now ad agencies realized that human brain[not all human brains at least] didn’t grow with the speed of technology–the internet and greed–and that brain still tends to react in almost the same way to porn, the way it would to actual presence of a person. Now they mixed this discovery with loneliness and desperation of population by making hoardings king-size and beautifully lit by neons and suave models… and SOLD, SOLD, SOLD!! They looked for more where they obviously were to–the porn–’cause it already is ruling the back of the mind of lonely, lazy and miserable. This pretty much defines raciness of ads, demands for models to be some specific way and that reciprocating in thought of young girls who are looking for attention of young[hormone overdosed and bullied, to be honest, bodies] guys, who find these ads the most appealing! Then followed POP with Britney Spears singing ‘Gimme More’, trying to somehow become Madonna–who I consider one of very few who have real understanding of erotica–and hence followed a whole generation of similar plastic POP-porn artists–jassica simpson, Miley Cyrus, Pussycat Dolls etc.


… nothing. There is only one solution to all the problems–find what you love to do and try to make it the best you can… have hobbies! It’s okay to not have an iPhone.

The Casualness of Sex

Well, today a senior of mine asked me why people cannot understand that sex should be more casual in India.. so as they don’t make a big issue out of it. I tried to dodge the bullet ‘cause I don’t think sex ever can be casual. I mean I have been told, and I must agree, that two people cannot be physically closer than while having sex. How can then this closest of ‘em all be casual?

Plus, there is release of dopamine and oxytocin chiefly which means you bond more at the moments around orgasm ‘cause these neurochemicals relax you entirely and make your body more aware of smells of your partner both at the same time! Moreover, you’ll be naked which is the most honest you can be, until you’re a bastard in clothing of a human body! If you can make this thing casual, you are disowning a great great experience of being human, in my opinion.

For a person like me who fails to ask of things like a sheet to cover himself at night when its cold, dislikes to sleep or eat, constantly wants to keep his cell-phone off, doesn’t even ask for more food even when hungry and at home, sex can never be casual. And I am fine with this. I was born 3 days short of 1990 and yet I find myself most comfortable in a life which used to be… more free it was.