It’s like I constantly require something to do, something to keep me occupied! And it is becoming insane! I cannot sit quietly for even a moment. I would just play music here and open one development portal there and then Scientific American articles and would keep reading on wordpress and writing some code or reading about some new technology and then some news item which concerns me and this and that…! It just doesn’t stop! I cannot stop!
If I have to go out, and I smoke or something, my head would being going about the things again… very noisy all the time! If I have slept more than 5 hours, then I certainly am damned ’cause everything I could have done in 5 hours begins to prod me! And I dislike my present already, and hence I never be able to day dream at all! Music and sketching used to help; now they make hollowness worse because of all the time which I keep from doing what I consider I must have!
When I have resolved one of the things which were stuck, I feel very hollow… I begin to fall.